Free tool · Fun, mostly
Roast my homepage
A sharp marketing critic reads your homepage and roasts it: the buzzwords, the mystery headline, the seven "Get started" buttons. Every joke sits on a measured fact, and every jab comes with a fix. Safe for work.
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Questions
How it works
Is this mean?
It is a roast, so yes, a bit. But it roasts the website, not the people: no jokes about anyone's name, looks or background, no profanity, and it says what is genuinely good. A great homepage gets a gentle roast and an honest 9.
What is it based on?
Things we can measure: the title tag, the meta description, the H1s, word count, buzzword counts, button labels, image alt text, structured data, the footer year, whether pricing is mentioned. The jokes are written on top of those facts, never invented.
Can I share it?
Please do. Every roast has its own link and a one-line share text, and a roast of the same site shows the same result to everyone for a week.
Who is roasting me, exactly?
The same critic that works inside AI CMO Studio, where the jokes are replaced by fixes: an SEO specialist, an AI-search specialist, writers and social departments that read your site and bring you drafts every week. If the roast stung in a useful way, start the studio free.
